My Prom Days Are Long Gone, Thankfully

I never actually saw the inside of the prom. Who knows how strange that could have been?
I never actually saw the inside of the dream prom. Who knows how strange that could have been?

I had a strange dream last night about chauffeuring three Highland Park High School football players and their dates to the prom. This scenario was rife with problems.

Minor problems:

  • One of the girls was standoffish all night because, she claimed, I once kicked her while reporting a story.
  • My bow tie was too tight, there was a hole in my tuxedo shirt, and my cap was too small.
  • I was wearing a cap with a tuxedo.

Major problems:

  • I was trying to chauffeur three football players and their dates in my actual car, a 2002 Jetta station wagon with more than 100,000 miles on the odometer.
  • The valets at Dallas Country Club disassembled said car, which led to a fistfight.
  • I found myself chatting with three preteen boys outside the country club, where one of them made a derogatory joke about Jews. My response: “Yeah, you know, that reminds me of something that happened at my bar mitzvah.”

This was one of those nightmares that was so long and vivid that I woke up genuinely bothered, as if all of these absurd things actually happened. Please provide your armchair analysis.

3 thoughts on “My Prom Days Are Long Gone, Thankfully

  • January 3, 2014 at 6:14 pm
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    Maybe lay off the sleeping aids/medication if you are taking any. Some OTC sleeping aids have the side effects of vivid and odd dreams.

    Reply
  • January 7, 2014 at 2:51 pm
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    Sounds like the plot to a killer 1980s John Hughes film.

    Reply

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