POSSIBLE INTERN

Today I made the regrettable error of interviewing someone for an internship without first looking at the resume. Under “Skills and Abilities” the applicant wrote, “Have typed a six-page paper on the wrongness of incest,” “Timer—Have helped people without watches watch their time,” and “Trustworthy—Have told my teacher I actually received a 90 on a quiz when it was marked a 100.” And those are just a few of the gems on this resume, folks.